Dead To Me

big·ot  (bgt)

n.

One who is strongly partial to one's own group, religion, race, or politics and is intolerant of those who differ.

It has been a while since I last posted a blog.  I wish I could writing with a more positive update, but sadly that is not the case.  A terrible act of bigotry was committed against me over the weekend.  It came from my "brother"-in-law.  He is no brother of mine.  He has no place in my family.  I do not tolerate bigotry, especially when it is directed at me personally.  Going forward in this blog, I will only reference him as my sister's husband.

I was asked by my oldest sister to babysit her three-year-old daughter for two weeks while she goes to work.  I agreed to do so, as she offered to pay me for it.  On Sunday evening, prior to the Monday I was to start babysitting my niece, I received a message from my mother.  She informed me that I no longer had to worry about watching my niece.  What is the reason?  My sister's husband said that he didn't trust me.  Why?  He believes that with me being a transgender individual I will molest his child.  WHAT??!!!

As you might image, this completely absurd accusation really set me off.  How dare this "man" accuse me of such a terrible thing?  I would never harm a child.  I ventured out of my bedroom to confront this prejudiced bigotry.  I got into a shouting match with this piece of scum.  His excuse for making such a claim?  He claims statistical proof that gay people are more likely to molest children.  Notice how he equates being transgender with being gay, even though they are two completely different things.  According to him all transgender people are homosexuals, and all homosexuals want to molest children.  He goes on to claim that he has God on his side.  This is how he shows that he is a Christian?  He is a member of the LDS Church.

During the argument, he adds more insult to injury.  He says while abuse may not happen, he doesn't want me to influence his child.  He is afraid that I will try to make his child become gay or transgender.  He obviously does not realize that being gay or transgender is not a choice or something that is learned.  I fully believe that it is something people are born with.  I expect that someday there will be full scientific proof to back up this claim.  However these are my personal views.  Out of respect for the wishes of my siblings, I have never said one word about being transgender to any of their children.  Not only that, but I do not even talk about any social issues with their children.  I respect their wishes to not allow their kids to learn about these issues from me.  This is how that respect is returned to me?  Respect is a two way street.  If you expect me to respect your beliefs and opinions, then you should also respect me in the same way.

If this is love from within a family, then I want no part of it.  I do not want to offend anyone who is reading this who has done nothing wrong to me, but I have to express the following thoughts.  It is people like this scum of a man who is married to my sister that cast a bad light on the religious community as a whole.  When he makes statements that his opinions are in the name of God, he is representing his religion.  He is saying that God says that all LGBT people are bad and immoral.  I only add this to try to help show why the LGBT community becomes so angry with the religious community.  I fully realize that not all religious people are like this man who has wronged me.

I will not take such a terrible and baseless accusation lying down.  I will not allow such horrible and untrue things to be said about me.  I will stand up, and defend my good name.  I am a good person.  I try my best to show kindness and respect to all people.  I do not want to judge anyone, as I do not like to be judged myself.  I know that I am right to live an authentic life.  I will not allow anyone to tear me down.  If you are not willing to accept me for who I am, then you have no place in my life.  That may be a blunt statement, but I will not allow myself to be surrounded by people who only want to tear me down.  I deserve to live a happy life, and I will do just that.

In closing, this man is dead to me.  I told him as much last night.  I told him that he is no longer welcome in my life at all.  I will move forward, and leave him in the past.  He is nothing more than a memory to me now.  I have two music videos to share that I have dedicated to this despicable man.  If you are offended by cussing, I suggest you do not watch the videos.  Thank you for taking the time to read this blog.  Getting this out helps me to release the anger I have felt from the situation.  I will now focus on leaving it in the past as I move on with my life.

-Katie Marie